


Just Like You

by thecattydddy



Series: Just A Hero's Story [2]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Explicit Language, Multi, Romance, Superfamily, Superfamily (Marvel)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-04-10 23:55:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4412906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecattydddy/pseuds/thecattydddy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several years after Peter finds his parents, Wade is tracking a very fake, not real version of Spidey. He follows it to New York City where he meets his long time idol and the subject of his infatuation, Spiderman. Unfortunately, the creature he's tracking realizes his feelings for the wall crawler and uses it against him. Will Wade be able to rescue Peter or will he have to sacrifice the best things in life to rid himself of the not so great ones?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

"Reader! You know, you'll get a much better reading experience if you turn that there Creator's Style back on."

[Unless of course you can't, in which case just enjoy the story as is, I suppose.]

{But if you **caaaaaan...** }

"Yeah, if you _caaaaaan_ then you totally should!"

* * *

Wade still felt things from his old life. In reality, it was never a question of whether he was the old Wade Wilson – The Merc with the Mouth – but of what strange new breed of himself that he was. Things that'd once been part of him hadn't just _disappeared_ , they'd _morphed_ into something twisted and wrong and broken that even his half-deranged mind could feel was off. The most upsetting thing about these things were not that he lost them, but that they couldn't be spared the change.

One of those things, incidentally enough, had been Spiderman. Oh, how he'd just _adored_ that cute little spider and the way he webbed up bad guys instead of doing them in like those bastards deserved. How it made his heart flutter to see his precious baby boy, wearing his tight spandex outfit and flitting about the city of New York. Once upon a time, this infatuation felt more like respect, admiration. He'd wanted to _be_ Spiderman, but crazed scientist doctors sometimes change things when they get inside your head. Suddenly respect becomes infatuation and killing becomes even _more_ fun! Part of him felt the perversion of his old life in this new one, but you can't really complain when you're having. So. Much. _Fun_.

Oh, that reminded him on why he'd gone off on that whole tangent of thinking about dark and depressing things. At that very moment, a very annoying fake Spiderman was thinking it'd get the drop on him, but little did it know that good old Deadpool has a regeneration factor so what the fuck is that drop gonna do for him, anyways?

“Oooooh, _Caaarrnnaaaageee_ ,” he called in a sing-songy voice, definitely having caused a chill to run up someone's spine – If someone had been there, that is.

“But the author is here,” Wade pointed out, one sword turned in the direction of the sky because the author isn't here, they're just telling the story. Stop interrupting and go back to fighting your adversary.

“Did I send a chill up your spine, Author?” Wade cooed, batting his eyes even though no one could see them behind his mask. If the author _had_ been there, they might have said something along the lines of him being kind of terrifying, if not interesting from a safe distance.

“Aaaw! You've hurt my feelings,” Wade pouted. While he was busy exchanging conversation with seemingly _no one_ because the author _isn't part of the story_ , his opponent was creeping behind him in the shadows, its tongue flicking out momentarily.

{Now the Author is just being mean _._ }

They're trying to direct the attention off of themselves before the reader gets disinterested.

{The Reader is just jealous because they didn't think to do it first.}

“That's about enough of that! Didn't your mama ever teach you that sneaking up on people isn't nice?” The mercenary stated, flipping backwards and aiming to land a katana in the creatures neck. Much to his dismay, the other was quicker. A red weblike substance shot out and took Wade by the leg, slamming him into a building. A crack resounded through the immediate area, followed by a groan.

“Just my fucking spine. Nothing to get all weepy about.” Leaning back in a stretch, Wade let out another pained sound before resuming his fight, weapons still clutched tightly in his fingers. “Come on, fake Spidey! That the best you got?”

The creature screeched loud enough to shatter a few windows; Car sirens blared out in objection. Even Wade was forced to cover his ears. “Oi! Babe, listen. I love hearing your screams as much as the next guy, but tone it down a little or the neighbors are gonna hear us!”

[Perhaps we should take this somewhere a little more private?]

A quick glance around them showed the obvious destruction he'd left in his wake. Working in civilian areas was so annoying. At least when he was breaking into secret lairs, no one complained when he didn't clean up after himself. “I like your thinking, but I think I'm just gonna finish up here.” The swords clattered from his hands and the creature paused, confused by his actions. A long dagger was pulled out of his pants and he brandished it in front of him, smirking.

{Don't worry, Reader. It's not _**that**_ kind of dagger. ;) }

“We could make it that kind of dagger,” Wade added. Now, however, was not the time for him to be flashing his junk. “Excuse you. Every time is the right time to be doing that.”

Wade's attention was shifted to the creature before him, partially because Carnage doesn't break the fourth wall and also because a certain mercenary is supposed to be fighting him. He hissed, tongue poking out at Wade in what was probably supposed to be threatening.

“Oh, you aren't scared, are you?” Wade wondered, amusement painting his face at the way the other back away from him like a caged animal, “Remember when little Deadpool got freaky with your girlfriend? Probably wasn't as nice for her as it was for me, but what'cha gonna do about it?”

The creature shrieked, again. It shot a more of it's weblike substance, morphed into some kind of claw. Wade dodged it by leaning back and then slashing it with the dagger. It recoiled in pain, the broken substance withering into a rotten chunk on the sidewalk.

“Ah, that never gets old,” he sighed, kissing the blade and coming away with a slightly burned feeling on his lips. The thing was created to rewrite biology, specifically on a mortality level, to kill anything. If there was ever a thing that could kill him, this was probably it. He hadn't tried it, yet, because if it didn't work, it was gonna hurt like a bitch. Already, this thing had helped him down enough things that it was like his own little buddy.

His little buddy that he'd won in a poker game.

Carnage seemed to be doing a lot of screaming, lately and that was really starting to get on Wade's nerves. A part of him considered throwing the knife and hoping it landed in the things throat to shut him up. Any other weapon, he totally would have gone for it, but if the other gotta hold of this one there was no way he'd be beat and the Amazing Deadpool wasn't going to die at the hands of the generic not-as-cool version of evil Spiderman.

Wade was getting ready to make another swipe at him, when the creature turned and ran, his disappearance as quick as his discovery had been.

“What? No! Get back here! Shit, shit, shit,” Wade panicked, tucking the dagger back in its place and swooping in to grab his neglected blades before chasing the thing down. A few minutes of aimless running and cursing under his breath proved fruitless.

[Well, that is not how I expected this encounter to go.]

{We had it cornered and everything!}

[Where do you think it is now?]

“Come on, Guys. Don't be ridiculous,” Wade rolled his eyes, putting his swords away and brushing his clothes off, “I know exactly where it went.”

[You do?]

{Oh! Where? Where? Is it Disneyland? :D}

“This is a _Spideypool_ story, _remember_?” Wade reminded the boxes, tapping on his head, “ _Obviously_ it went to New York.”

{Oh.}

[Oh.]


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's just not a good day for poor Spiderman.

Peter sighed, looking up at his school. The morning had been relatively quiet for him – Not even a mugging on the way there – and he had even arrived on time. He joined in with the crowd entering the building, effortlessly working his way through them because of years of experience. Despite the fact it would have been much easier to attend school a little closer to home, Peter had insisted on returning to Midtown. His friends were here and all his favorite teachers and it was a familiar atmosphere. No one wanted to give that up halfway through high school and he was no exception.

Unfortunately, that also meant he had to come back to the problems in Midtown as well. One problem in particular greeted him that morning by slamming him against a locker, a smirk set across his face, “Hey there, Puny Parker! What'cha got for lunch, today?”

“Flash,” Peter grumbled, shooting a look at the larger blonde. Flash Thomson was a long time bully of his. They'd known each other since elementary school and their relationship had only started to change even the slightest bit in these last few years. The both of them were now seniors and Spiderman had taught Flash some really important lessons about being the bigger man. Usually, he was proud of the other's progress, but sometimes old habits die hard, “Don't you have someone else to bug this morning?”

“Nah. I cleared my schedule just for you, Parker!” Flash showed his teeth, the look starting to creep Peter out a little. Why this guy got such enjoyment from making his life miserable, Peter would never know.

“ _Psst. Sock him in the jaw._ ”

Peter froze at the sudden appearance of a voice, unable to discern where it was coming from. It sounded cheerful and freaked Peter out a little more than Flash did.

“What?” Peter muttered, making Flash narrow his eyes and take hold of his collar.

“I said gimme your lunch money, Parker.”

“ _Think if you hit him hard enough he'll go running to Mommy?_ ”

That time, Peter was positive he wasn't just hearing thing. He shook his head, trying to convince the voice to go away, “No.”

“No?” Flash laughed, “I guess we gotta do this the hard way, Parker.”

“Yeah, guess so.” The voice came from behind Flash this time, sounding almost disappointed. Both boys turned to look towards the sound and Flash's face drained of all its color. There, standing in a full red and black suit, was a man. Two swords were strapped to his back and several guns were holstered to his person. A glance towards the ceiling showed an open vent, which must have been the stranger's entry point.

“Take Parker!” Flash exclaimed, shoving Peter towards the man and darting off. He wasn't really surprised by the quarterback's behavior at this point.

“Oh, goodie! I was hoping to run into you!” the man exclaimed, giddily. He took hold of Peter's arm and tossed him over his shoulder, much to his alarm.

“Hey! Lemme go!” Peter struggled against his captor, but the other held him in place, easily. People were beginning to realize what was happening and students and staff both ran off in every direction. The strange man clad in red simply dodged them, heading for the window at the end of the hallway.

“You know, I was beginning to wonder how I would find you!” the man prattled on, seemingly unaffected by the screaming going on all around him, “I mean when I went to the paper company to put a request in for a classified on the front page, I was _really_ lucky to have spotted your work, but they only gave me your name, ya know? I've been scoping out high schools all over Queens in a hope of catching up to you!” 

Peter didn't get a chance to answer before the stranger pulled out his gun and shot the window, the glass shattering around him and leaving an opening big enough to escape through. He let out a whoop as he fell from the second floor and hit the ground below. He started running for the edge of the property, laughing like the whole thing was some kind of game. Peter looked for some way to escape his captor, but the area had too many witnesses. Using his powers now would result in him being discovered. He tried to reach for his pocket, but his arms were pinned at his side and unable to move.

“So, Peter right?” the man asked, ducking behind a building as a police car drove past in the direction they'd come from, “I gotta say, I'm a fan of your work. Spiderman is my all time _favorite_ and you take such _pretty_ pictures of my baby boy!” He was off again once the sirens had started to fade and easily scaled a few metal pillars holding up the subway tracks. Peter's spider senses were tingling off the chart, especially when the other made a jump for the speeding train, his climbing up the vehicle and flipping off just before it headed for a tunnel.

“Who the hell are you?” Peter demanded, struggling anew. He really didn't want to end up flattened under the train. That would be an awful way to die and his parents would be so pissed at him.

“Me? Well, most people call me Deadpool, but I like you, so you can call me Wade,” the man answered, picking his way across the top of a billboard. Peter had never really felt afraid of heights, but that was a really long way to fall if the idiot misstepped.

“Why did you kidnap me?” Peter knew there could be a lot of reasons. The most likely was probably that his father was Tony Stark. The big time CEO had come into his life about two years prior and it'd been quite an experience, ever since. After a miffed employee managed to get ahold of Peter, Tony and Steve – his other father – had promptly lost their shit and put all kinds of security measures up. His school had more security guards posing as staff than it did students and, one could never forget that his principle was some secret agent working for the same guy that the Avengers did. Never in the history of ever had a kid had a harder time escaping than he did. Actually, the fact that this Wade guy had managed to sneak into his school to kidnap him was kind of impressive. “If you're trying to get money, then you know my parents don't do ransoms.”

“Trust me, Kid. If I was after money there are jobs that pay a lot more than whatever your daddy makes at his office gig,” Wade rolled his eyes. A hop skip and a jump later, they were standing on a fire escape, which he easily scaled to reach the top of a building. Satisfied, he put Peter down on the ground and stood over him, “Okay. Think we've lost the po-po. I've gotta ask you a favor, actually.”

“I doubt that,” Peter mumbled. When he'd been released, he rubbed the back of his neck, trying to figure out where he'd been taken. It looked like the roof of a regular apartment room, fairly common in certain parts of the City. He looked over at Wade, his brow furrowed.

Wade took this as a sign to continue, “Well, see, I noticed you were Spidey's main photographer and figured there was no way you could get such good pictures without knowing the guy! I wont bore you with the details, but I'm pretty sure I need to meet up with him right away.”

“What do you want with Spiderman?” Peter demanded, eyes narrowed. If this was some plot to catch him or something…

“Nothing bad!” Wade insisted, hands shooting up to reassure the kid, “Like I said, Spiderman is my absolute _faaavvooorrriiitttee_! Look, I even have his merch!” Wade reached into his pants and pulled until a strip of fabric showed, stitched with a webbed pattern that matched Peter's suit. The boy grimaced at the sight of them, a little freaked out. Wade tucked his underwear away, again and gave Peter a hopeful look. He wasn't really sure how he could tell through the other's mask, but somehow he could, “I just _really_ need to find him. It's important.”

“Important enough to kidnap me?” Peter demanded. He still thought this guy seemed like a total psycho, but he sounded sincere enough. If he really did need Spiderman's help, Peter couldn't exactly turn him down, could he?

“Look, I'm sorry about that, alright?” Wade apologized, exasperation evident in his voice, “I'll put you right back where I found you! Honest, I will! Just… Can you _pretty please_ tell him to meet me? Pretty please with a cherry on top?” Peter slid his hand into his pocket, thinking over his options. His fingers brushed over a small device, hovering over the button on it. His parents had given it to him incase he'd ever found himself in danger. They'd be able to track him with it and, best of all, it wasn't as easily broken as any old communicator. If he pressed it, they'd be here in no time flat and this guy wouldn't think about coming near him, again.

Peter looked at the way Wade stood, hands clenched into fists and drawn into his chest like a middle school girl about to meet their favorite celebrity. Actually, with the guys obvious obsession with Peter, that description was more accurate than he would like to admit. With a sigh, Peter nodded, hand sliding out of his pocket and resting on the ground behind him. He looked off towards the city, unable to quite meet Wade's eyes… Mask… Whatever.

“Fine,” Peter gave in, “I'll talk to him. Where do you want to meet?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the idea of Deadpool just showing up in NYC and being all THIS GUY DOES THE PICTURES FOR THE PAPER GOTTA FIND HIM and does literally zero research on the kid at all. More importantly, though, is that Wade finally meets "Spiderman" in the next chapter! Yaaaay!


	3. Chapter 3

Peter was dead. He was gonna die and then Tony was gonna somehow find a way to bring him back to life and then he was going to die _again_.

He was pretty sure the security system had stopped going off. His costume was kind of sticking to him uncomfortably from all the heavy sweating he was doing. How had he been so stupid as to set off the alarm? He'd been sneaking out for _years_ without a hitch and all the sudden he was going to see some guy and he lost his head. If ever there was a sign that doing this was the worst idea he'd ever had, that was about as clear as it got. He couldn't believe that he was still doing this. The only thing that kept him from turning around was the fact Tony was totally gonna sick Steve on him with those big blue eyes and his whole “I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed” speech. The thought alone was starting to make him feel awful and he needed to do something heroic to make that stop.

Fortunately, his spider senses perked up at the sound of a lady screaming and he was off to deal with that. The scene was a simple mugging. A rookie job, really. He swooped in and landed directly on the back of the perp, kicking him away from the defenseless middle-aged woman. As soon as she saw the opportunity, she was running off without so much as a thank you. He was used to it.

“Joe!” a second voice called from farther down the alley they'd found themselves in and two more people emerged from behind a dumpster, looking ready to fight. Peter sighed. Alright, maybe not so simple, but he could do this. A gunshot broke the fight up before it could start, startling Peter just as much as the muggers. A figure approached them, bringing his foot down on the head of the first criminal Peter had taken care of, sending his face into the pavement and breaking his nose with a load crack. Blood dripped onto the ground, much to Peter's horror. The figure was partially hidden by the shadows, except for a few spots of red on his costume and the white slits that must have been his eyes. The handgun in his fingers was smoking a bit, pointed directly at all of them. The cool and collected expression he sent them had Peter's spider senses screaming to leave _right now_. There was no doubt in his mind this man was capable of – and more than willing to participate in – murder.

“ _Hola_! _Me llamo la pi_ _s_ _cina de muerte_!” he chirped, ruining the illusion. He strutted forward, settling beside Peter and waved the gun lazily, “Ya know, usually I'd blow your brains out, but I'm feeling _really_ generous because your friendly neighborhood Spidey is here and that just tickles me pink!” He spent a few seconds giggling to himself and Peter was terrified, again, but it was a different kind of terror. The getting attacked by rapid fangirls kind.

“So,” and the serious guy was back. The changes were so sudden and so drastic that his head was starting to spin, “I suggest you turn right on around and run your little selves home. If you interrupt my date with Spidey again tonight with your evil doings, I wont be so nice.”

The two guys were down the alley as fast as they could go, pushing the other out of the way. The man chuckled, bringing his gun up to aim at them. His words were soft, probably meant for himself more than anything, “Remember when I said I was feeling generous? Yeah, I _lied_.”

“No!” Peter shouted, snapping out of his zone. He took hold of the gun with a web and brought it down. Unfortunately, he hadn't moved fast enough to keep it from hitting the perp, but it landed in his leg instead of anywhere vital and he just kept on running. Peter waiting until they were out of sight before releasing the web and willing his beating heart to calm down. That was too close. _Way_ too close. This guy – Wade. He'd said his name was Wade that afternoon – was going to shoot that man down in cold blood. _Who the hell was he?_

_“_ Aaaaw. Way to ruin my fun, Spidey,” Wade pouted, his shoulders slumping. He fit his gun back into its holster and turned to look at the boy, “But I'm so happy to see you! You're just as cute in person!” Peter let out a squeal when a hand grabbed onto his behind and he was suddenly up the closest wall to get out of the other's reach. He was pretty sure his face was red enough that it showed through his mask. “And such a perky ass!”

“Keep your hands to yourself,” Peter hissed, regretting coming even more, now. Wade held his hand behind his back in what was probably meant to be an innocent school girl look. Why his whole _being kidnapped_ earlier in the day hadn't alerted him that this guy couldn't be trust, he didn't know. The man had seemed genuinely in need of help, but now… “This isn't where we agreed to meet.”

“I know, but I saw you there and couldn't help myself,” Wade admitted, practically shaking in his boots because he was so excited. He brought his hands up in front of his face, shyly hiding behind them.

“I bet,” Peter grumbled. His eyes narrowed, “You were going to shoot that man.”

Wade paused, the excitement drowning out of his face and replaced with confusion. “I know you're a goodie to the max, but he was a bad guy! I don't see what the big deal is. I was helping.” Peter wasn't really sure how to answer that, so the voices helped him out a little bit.

[It's because you were going to kill him.]

“ _Ooooooh_!” Wade hit his forehead, smiling at sudden understanding, “It's because I was gonna kill him, isn't it? Aw, that's really noble of you, Baby boy. Boring and absolutely no fun, but noble!”

“Yeah, this was a terrible idea,” Peter concluded, already crawling up the wall and hoping to get as far away from Wade as possible. This creep was freaking insane. There were enough other heroes in the city to deal with this guy if he became a problem. This was the superhero capital of the world.

“Wait, wait! You can't leave! I need your help!” Wade pulled one of his swords from his back and embedded in the wall to give himself a boast upward. Before Peter knew what was happening, he was laying on the ground with Wade sitting on top of him and pleading with him in what sounded like every way possible in English, Spanish and… French?

“I didn't mean to upset you! _S'il vous pla_ _ît ne pas aller, Spidey_! ¡ _Quería ayudar_!” Peter gave him a look, bringing his hands up to stop the other from talking. The boy still wasn't really sure how he could see Wade's pleading expression through his mask, but he could. He wiggled a little more to try and get comfortable while being straddled by the larger person.

“Chill, will you?” Peter demanded, eying him, “I get it. You're sorry. And, pro-tip? I only speak English… And Latin, I guess, but not really.”

“Latin?” Wade questioned, a little confused, “You know that's a dead language, right?”

“Okay, first of all,” Peter pursed his lips, kind of hurt, “Fuck you. Secondly, Latin is still very much alive in the science world. Everyone has to take a language to graduate high school and when I saw they were offering it, I signed up. It's a lot more helpful to me than French, anyways.”

“Aw! You're a little nerd, too!” Wade cooed, moving closer to Peter's face, “That's so cute! Say something nerdy! Pretty please!”

“What?” Fed up with this behavior, he pushed Wade off of him and scrambled into a crouch before Wade to reclaim his spot. It'd started being awkward, anyways. “No! Listen, you called me here because you wanted my help with something. If you're just going to waste my time, I've got a city to protect.”

“Actually, that's what I need your help with,” Wade admitted. He'd landed on his ass when he'd been pushed away and, deciding it was a good a position as any, placing his hands behind him and rocked his feet side to side. “I kinda am hunting this fake you and it got away from me, but I knew it was coming here! I haven't been able to find it, yet, but I figure if I hang out with you long enough, I'm bound to happen across it sooner or later… That's where you come in!”

Peter took a moment to gawk at the spandex clad man before him. “You lost me at hunting a fake version of myself. Start at the beginning.”

Wade pouted, obviously displeased. With an exaggerated sigh, he hopped to his feet and Peter followed his example at a more hesitant pace. “It's such a long story, though! Can we at least get out of this alley? That guy over there is starting to smell up the place.” He pointed a thumb at the perp he'd stepped on earlier, who was out cold. Peter made a face and, while Wade had his back turned to examine the guy, crawled up the wall.

“He does kinda represent something nice, though,” Wade admitted, placing his hand on his hips as he admired the unconscious person before him, “It's like he represents our combined teamwork! How sweet! Maybe I should take a picture for my scrapbook! First guy I took down with Spidey! Hey… Um... Spidey?” His grin faded when he turned around, finding the alley empty of any wall crawlers. He was about to call out, again, when something attached to his back and was pulling him upwards. He landed with a gasp on a roof, Peter standing over him.

“Better?” he inquired, not waiting for Deadpool to answer. He took a seat crouched on the edge of the building, overlooking the city with his back to Wade. “I still have to do my job, but I'm listening. Start from the beginning and _maybe_ I'll consider helping you.”

“ _Really_?” Wade asked, bringing his hands together in front of his heart. His voice might have raised half an octave or so.

“No promises.” Peter shot him a look through his mask that screamed authority, “Start talking.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

“Well,” Wade began, laying back on the rooftop with his hands behind his head, “It all began when I was born. You see, I had sixty seconds of a normal life before my mother was attacked by ninjas!”

“ _Deadpool_.” Peter's voice demanded full seriousness. “I don't want to hear your made up origin story – I want to know about this thing I'm supposed to be helping you find.”

“Excuse you!” Wade replied, offended, “My origin story is one hundred percent genuine! And, besides, you aren't helping me find anything.”

“What? Why do you even need my help, then?”

Wade closed his eyes; Not that it mattered, though. They were already hidden behind his mask. “I need to find him, but I'm pretty sure that as long as I'm with you, he'll come to us. This is a _Spideypool_ story, you see. The plot is bound to advance if you and I are together. I'm not sure if we're gonna be _together together_ , though. I mean, you'd think, but the Author did kill Captain America in the last story, so I wouldn't put it past them to build a bunch of sexual tension and not follow through with the goods.”

“You've lost me, again.”

“They might try to kill one of us though. Probably not me, because that would go against canon.”

{They wouldn't kill Spiderman, either. They've got a _hu_ _uuuu_ _ge_ crush on him. }

“ _Oooo_. Very True. Okay, nah. You and me are fine, Spidey. No worries.” He shot a smile in Peter's direction, which was met with only complete disbelief.

“New question,” Peter suggested, beginning to just accept that he had involved himself with some kind of deranged weirdo. It was becoming a more and more messed up night. “What exactly are you hunting in the first place.”

“Some kind of messed up murderous creature.” Wade answered, nonchalantly. “I like to call him fake Spidey, but I think the official name is… Carnage?”

“Carnage, huh?” Peter furrowed his brow. Could they have picked a less conspicuous name? Finding no immediate threats to himself or the city in his sweep, he turned to face the masked mercenary.

“Yep!” Wade confirmed with a thumb pointed towards the sky. “I don't really know everything about him, but I do know that the real killer has some poor bastard trapped inside him. He kinda acts like a suit, except you can never get out of it and it swings you around like a puppet.”

“Like venom?” Peter demanded, sitting up a little straighter in alarm. He was fairly certain he had destroyed the symbiote during his last encounter with it, but it never did seem to want to disappear for long.

“I've got no clue who that is, so I'm going to say sure. Why not?” Wade offered, “Gonna tell me the story?”

“Venom was… We had a certain partnership for a while,” Peter explained. His glance was cast away in shame. “It went sour and he… He took control of me, to an extent. A lot of things happened that I regret. He's taken a lot of other hosts since then, but what he really wants is to be reunited with me. He told me he was created from the same DNA that I was. I wasn't really sure I believed that and he never really explained it, so I can't tell you much else.”

“What… Kind of things did you do?” If Peter had been possessed by a different version of this Carnage, then there was a possibility that there were two murderous creeps out in the world and he'd have to take care of _both_ of them.

[We did not sign up for that.]

{Yeah! They could at least pay us for our good deeds!}

“It doesn't matter… Just some stuff, okay?” Peter snapped, defensively. He knew that Venom had been the real culprit, but Peter hadn't been unconscious or anything during the entire event. Watching your own two hands do something was really just as bad as having done it yourself, sometimes.

“Spidey.” Wade sounded surprisingly gentle, which only succeeded in making the other's guard rise. “Did you kill anybody?”

“What? No!” Peter was astonished that _Deadpool_ of all people would even ask that.

“Pffft. Lame.” The words were meant as a joke, but a hint of relief slipped through his tone. Well, at least that was one less thing to worry about. “Anyways, this thing I'm dealing with kinda sounds like yours except more… Stabby. I guess. Speaking of which – That's how I was going to deal with it, actually! With this!”

Peter's entire face turned red when Wade suddenly reached into his pants and he was reminded how fortunate he was that his outfit included a full face mask. The red only lessened slightly when Wade pulled his hand out and started waving a dagger around, cheerfully. “What the hell is that?”

“ _Well,_ ” Wade began, excitedly. He held the dagger up to his eye to inspect it while he spoke, “This little baby I got from a poker game. Took me forever to find her. Legend says it can kill anything. Not sure if I believe that, but she does pack quite a wallop. That's why I keep her next to little Wade. They have a lot in common. Ha!”

“You're disgusting,” Peter muttered. “And you seriously expect me to believe you won it in a poker game?”

“Okay, so _maybe_ I won it in a knife fight after _interrupting_ a poker game,” Wade shrugged. “Same thing, right?”

“Not even in the slightest.” Peter rubbed his temple. This whole conversation was giving him a headache. “And it doesn't matter. You can't use that knife on Carnage. What if you hurt the person inside?”

“Dude, he's some convict.” Wade pouted, his lower lip jutting out enough to actually be seen though his mask, “Killed like a gazillion people, including his own parents!”

“Yeah? And how many people have you killed?” Peter returned. That look from earlier wasn't something a novice wore. No, that was the look of a practiced man.

“That's different,” Wade returned, huffily, “I have a reason for doing what I do. A guy's gotta pay the bills one way or another. Besides, most of the assholes I gank have it coming. This guy just _enjoys_ killing people.”

“I don't kill people and I wont let you either,” Peter said. Even if this weirdo didn't have morals, he did, “You said you needed my help. I'm still not really sure with what, but I'm telling you now that, if you try and kill _anyone_ , I'm turning you over to the cops and not doing anything for you.”

Wade groaned and laid back down at the same time that Peter's phone started vibrating. Pulling it from his pocket, he pressed the on button to reveal that he had a text from Tony. The ominous “ _Home. Now._ ” may not be as long as Steve's usual seven paragraphs, but it sent a chill down his spine none the less.

“I have to go.” Peter stated, already tucking his phone away. All this excitement had caused him to forget how _totally_ dead he was. So dead. Probably at least three or four times.

“Already? We were just getting to really know each other!” Wade objected, sounding hurt. It made Peter feel a little bad to blow him off like this, but not enough to ignore his parents.

“We'll talk again… Later,” Peter offered in way of condolences. “Just… Try to keep this Carnage thing from tearing apart my city.”

“Oh! One more thing, Spidey!” Wade latched onto his arm before he could swing away, “You can't tell anybody that I'm here! Especially not the big guys you're hanging out with these days. You know, Spangles and the Tinman? As a matter of fact, you should probably just avoid telling them any of this at all.”

“What? Why?” Peter asked. He wasn't really planning on telling Tony and Steve anyways, but if Wade was telling him not to, then that was a little suspicious.

He sheepishly shuffled his feet, giving the Spiderman that shy look, again. “Well… I don't exactly have the best reputation with them. They don't like me very much. Some stuff happened – Nothing too bad! Trust me! - and I guess I sort of left an impression. If they find out, I'm gonna be kicked out of the city and then we'll never fall in love!”

“We're not going to fall in love,” Peter scoffed. If nothing else, at least Wade was some character. “But don't worry. I wasn't going to tell them. I don't have to tell them everything.”

“Yay! Okay! Bye, Spidey!” He pressed a masked kiss against Peter's cheek and then sped off, giggling like a little school girl. It took Peter a moment to recover before he shook his head and swung away towards home, preparing himself for the worst.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to take this time to point out that I do not, in fact, have a crush on Spiderman. Andrew Garfield's may be an adorable and dorky-in-a-cute-way nerd, but that is all. My real true crush will forever be on Captain Steve Rogers.


	5. Chapter 5

When Peter got home, he was expecting to be smothered by his father's for a few moments as they checked for injuries. That probably would have been followed by being yelled at for a good thirty minutes from Tony and then Steve would have finally say it was late and they all were going to get some sleep. The conversation then would have had a fifty-fifty chance of continuing based on whether or not someone else was awake because Tony didn't like outsiders snooping in his parenting. If he managed to get past that, his crimes usually became irrelevant by the time he got home from school and his dads would be too preoccupied to think up some punishment besides no videogames after dinner or early bedtime. It was a pretty nice system and Peter was used to it.

This, however, is not what happened. Instead, within a few seconds of entering the house, Peter felt his legs fall out from under him and he was on the floor. His backpack had managed to slide halfway across the room. Looking up, he was met with the very intimidating site of one of his honorary uncles standing over him in a bathrobe and holding a cup of coffee. Peter felt like melting into the floor all of a sudden.

“Hey! What was that for?” the kid demanded because even if he was kind of startled, he wouldn't admit it.

“Inside voice, Kid. It ' s two in the morning,” the other reprimanded. 

“Yeah, speaking of which,” Peter grumbled, picking himself up off the floor and rubbing his stomach. It didn't really hurt, but his pride had taken a hit and it made him feel better. “What are you even doing up, Bucky? Aren't you usually in bed right now?”

The former winter soldier gave a small smirk, but it looked more annoyed than friendly. “Well,  _ someone  _ decided to take a little midnight stroll after setting off the alarm system and scaring the hell out of their dads and myself. I managed to convince Steve and Tony to go back to bed with the promise I'd go out and get you  if you weren't back within ten minutes. They're probably still awake, so I suggest you not make a lot of noise because Tony left pretty miffed.”

“Oh… Well… You didn't have to knock me to the floor the moment I walked in,” Peter pointed out. His voice was a little too quiet, but Bucky didn't mention it. 

“Well, if you'd been in bed like you were supposed to, I wouldn't have had to. Besides, you can handle it. I'm sure you suffered far worse while you were off risking your life doing who knows what.” The sharp, disapproving edge to Bucky's voice had Peter shuffling his feet, not quite able to meet the other's eye. Ever since Steve had shown back up, Sam and Bucky had sort of moved into the tower with them. It wasn't as if the  place hadn't had enough room and the alternative was them going back into hiding, which Tony was very strongly against. Him and Tony still didn't exactly know why they'd been off for so long anyways  and h e  usually  tried to ignore the occasional fight between  his dads about it. Other than that, the new additions to the house had been pleasant. Sam had let him get away with a lot and even let him put on his wings one time. Peter'd been sworn to secrecy, since everyone else would freakout if they knew. Bucky, on the other hand,  had been overly protective, sometimes even more than Tony. He'd been incredibly attentive to Peter, but sometimes – like now – that was less than appreciated. He at least had the consolation that Steve went through the exact same thing. 

The two of them were silent for a few minutes, the awkward situation settling over Peter like a blanket. Finally, Bucky broke it with an eyebrow raised. “That's it, then? You're just gonna stand there until I send you to bed? Not gonna explain yourself?”

Peter bit his lip, feeling the other's eyes bore into him. He'd made a promise not to tell anyone about Wade and, since lying never seemed to work on his honorary uncle, the only other option was to shrug and not say anything. Bucky's jaw twitched, but he must have been too tired to deal with whatever was going through Peter's mind, so he shook his head, instead. “Fine, but you're not getting out of this one. This weekend you're getting up at five and running laps.”

“ _ Aw _ ! Bucky, no!” Peter whined, shooting him a pleading look.  Tony had wasted a lot of money to install a small track in one of the lower levels after Steve had complained about not being able to go running. Since then, him, Sam and Bucky had all been using it almost every morning – Though sometimes Sam chose to go run in the city, instead, where he didn't have to compete with the two overpowered individuals that made up his team. Forcing Peter to get up and run with them seemed to be Bucky's favorite punishment and he  _ despised  _ it for much the same reason Sam did – He could never keep up.

“Not getting out of this, Kid.” Bucky steered him towards his bedroom with a hand on his shoulder. “Not even if your parents stack on their own thing. Next time, don't go setting off the alarms when you're sneaking out like an idiot. Now, go to bed.”

Peter let out a resigned sigh before glancing back at the other. “Good night, Bucky.”

“Good night, Peter.”

Peter made his way down the hall, grabbing his backpack off the floor as he went. Clicking his bedroom door closed behind him, he threw his bag in the corner with a huff. He  rummaged around his drawers for a few minutes before finding a pair of pajama pants with the Stark Industries logo printed on them and a white t-shirt. Swapping these for his street clothes and laid down face first on the bed. He was just about to fall asleep when a knock came at the door.

“Mmm?” he mumbled, barely loud enough for someone to hear it. If they didn't, then that was their own fault and they'd just have to wait to talk to him in the morning.

“Peter?” Steve's voice carried through the door, “Can I come in?”

“Sure, Pops.” The door cracked open just enough to let Steve into the room before he closed it, again, behind him. Peter yawned and sat up, staring at Steve with hooded eyes as he sat on the bed. “What's up?”

“I'm glad you're alright,” Steve mentioned, running his hands through Peter's hair. The action had become very familiar these past few years and Peter sleepily leaned into the touch. “You had your father and I very worried. I'm not mad at you, Son. Just… A little disappointed. You know better than to run off like that without us there to help you. And you certainly know better than to set the alarms off and make us think someone broke into the house.”

Peter swallowed, staring at his feet. “Bucky already is making me run laps this weekend, Pops. I get it.”

Steve gave a small smile at that. “I was wondering if he was going to. As much as I understand  where you're coming from, you still need to be safe, Peter. Clearly, you weren't thinking all that rationally tonight. Laps are a good way to clear up your mind a little.”

“I bet he didn't make you run laps when you were my age,” Peter grumbled. Steve snorted, trying to disguise it as a cough by bringing his arm in front of his face.

“He most certainly did,” Steve corrected, “Though, I had asthma and he would get too worried to make me keep going after thirty minutes or so. He got furious that I kept showing up with bruises, so he'd started making me spare with him, instead. Lemme tell you, you should be  _ happy _ he just makes you run.”

“He's kind of a jerk, sometimes” Peter stated, crossing his arms over his chest. “He knocked me over when I walked in, earlier.”

“You probably deserved it.”

“You're supposed to side with me, you know.”

Steve chuckled at that and placed a hand on Peter's far shoulder and pulled him in for a sideways hug. Peter yawned, again, and rested his head against his father's chest, eyes fighting to stay open. They sat like that for a moment before Peter looked up. “Hey, Pops?”

“What is it, Peter?” A hand rested motionless on the back of Peter's neck. It was comforting in a way, but it also betrayed just how worried him and Tony had been. The two of them were really having a hard time letting him have his space.

He considered telling Steve the truth, how he'd snuck out to meet up with some weirdo that kidnapped him and all that, but Peter knew that doing so would put his dads on edge. An incident on this scale would probably lead to another fight. Peter was an adult, now. He could handle this on his own. 

“Nevermind,” he mumbled, burying his face. When Tony found them later, they'd fallen asleep upright. Peter's head was tucked protectively into the other's person, Steve's cheek pressed against the top of his head. Both of them were breathing softly with closed eyes. The sight left a warm feeling in his heart. He almost regretted having to wake Steve up. The two of them better tucked their son in and pressed soft kisses to his forehead before leaving the room and closing the bedroom door behind them.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did ya'll miss me? ;)

Peter didn't see Wade again the next few days. Like Bucky had promised, Peter was woken up early Saturday morning to run laps with him and Steve, which he tried to talk his way out of the entire time. Steve greeted them with a small, understanding smile in Peter's direction and then they got to it. The morning was silent except for the occasional reminder from Bucky to pick up his feet every time he was passed. He hadn't even been allowed to bring his headphones and the silence was almost just as bad as the running. Around seven thirty Bucky said he could stop and Peter laid down face first on the track, his heart beating out of his chest. Steve let out a small laugh and offered his son a water bottle before helping Peter to his feet. They showered and changed and piled into the elevator. Bucky ruffled Peter's hair and told him he hoped he'd learned his lesson.  Steve broke in with some joke and by the time they reached their destination, they were clamoring out of the elevator laughing. 

“Captain! You seem to be in good humor!” a voice boomed, making Peter freeze in the door. Bucky put a hand on his shoulder, reassuringly.

“Yeah. Just finished up my run. Good to see you, Thor.” Steve crossed the room to link hands with the Asgardian in camaraderie.

“And you also,  old friend! Greetings, Frost Warrior! Who have you brought with you?” Thor turned to look at Peter.  The boy did his best not to look intimidated in turn. Why did his parents have such weird friends? Bucky, simply nodded at his greeting, so Steve stepped in for him.

“This is Tony and I's son, Peter. The one me and Tony have told you about,” Steve explained, waving Peter over, “Peter, this is your Uncle Thor. Come say hello.”

“Oh! The Spider child!” Thor's eyes lit up in realization, and Peter shot Steve an accusing look.

“You  _ told him _ ?” Peter demanded, only to have Thor laugh in response.

“No need to fear, Spider child!” Thor settling his arm over Peter's shoulder, much to the boy's annoyance. “I have been sworn to secrecy and I am a man of my word! Your identity is safe with me!”

“Is there a reason the prince of Asgard is in my house, crushing my son?” Tony interrupted their little moment, emerging from a hallway. He was wearing a pair of goggles over his eyes and covered in grease. A wretch was loosely clutched in one hand. He pushed his goggles out of the way and took in the scene before him.

“Now that you mention it, why are you here, Thor?” Steve wondered.

“Wait, did Dad just say prince of  _ Asgard _ ? He's  _ that _ Thor?” Peter squeaked. Suddenly, the arm draped over his shoulder seemed a lot heavier. H is outburst was ignored  by the others, for the time being.

“I have come b e aring news I feel will alarm you all,” Thor explained, his eyes draining of their amusement from moments before. “There has been  news of a disturbance in this area from Heimdel. I was inclined to warn you all in the event your youthful heir becomes endangered.”

“What kind of disturbances are we talking about here?” Tony's voice took an a hard edge and the expressions of the others all mirrored it, silently. It wasn't easy to make Spiderman feel small, but right now he was feeling down right minuscule. Living with two of his idols hadn't quite deterred the respect he had for them and the more of them that were in a room at once, the more overwhelmed the kid got. 

“He says the one delinquent that I have encountered a small number of times in my travels. Strangely enough, he reminds me somewhat of my brother with his thievery.” Thor glanced off to the side, as if bringing up a memory long since past. “The villain I speak of is none other than the Pool Of Death!”

There was a short minute while everyone tried to figure out who Thor could be referring to when, suddenly, the wretched dropped out of Tony's hands. He was unable speak, but fortunately Steve had come to the conclusion at the same time. He was a little more reserved, but his features still spoke of dislike. “You are referring to Deadpool, aren't you?”

“Indeed! The mercenary has been spotted in The fair city of New York.” Thor took the opportunity to place a hand on Peter's head, to which the boy was pretty sure was causing his bones to shatter under the pressure alone. “I am concerned for the well being of the Spider child.”

“With good reason!” Tony finally seemed to emerge from his daze. “There is no way I'm letting Peter out of my sight while that delinquent is in New York! I'll have his teachers or something send his work-”

“Dad, no!” Peter, for his part, was trying to not freak out about the fact he'd met up with the man in question just the other day. From what he could tell, Wade was not exactly welcome by his fellow heroes. While Peter thought the guy was kind of scary at first, he hadn't seemed _that_ horrible. As far as the boy could tell, Wade's intentions had been in the right place. Besides, it wasn't like he was going to be a prisoner in his own house because of one unpredictable idiot.

“Calm down, Tony,” Steve broke in to try and reason with him. “There's no reason to believe Peter is in any kind of danger. This is a big city and it's not like Deadpool has any reason to seek him out, specifically. I think if we just set a curfew and suspend vigilante work until we've caught the guy, then everything will be alright.”

“Pops! I thought you were on my side!” Peter whined, his voice raising an octave in objection. Already, he was under strict regulations about the kinds of baddies he could face. After the whole ordeal with Doctor Octopus, Tony had taken away his suit and strictly banned him from the practice, but after a lot of intense training and once his father had finished reenforcing it, Peter was allowed to go back on the streets so long as he left the bigger bads to the professionals. Neither of them really thought they could keep Peter from doing right, but they could still put rules on it. 

Now, however, they were talking about keeping him from his responsibilities, entirely and that was not something Peter was going to take lying down. Spiderman was part of who he was and taking that away was like striping him of his identity. Steve gave Peter a sympathetic look.

“It's just until this guy leaves,” the captain promised. “We're just worried about him trying to target less experienced heroes to aid him on whatever quest he's on and taking you off the playing field would certainly give us peace of mind.”

It took all of Peter not to give anything away. It wasn't like that had already happened and Peter had been _stupid_ enough to fall for it. Not at all. “Well… Why don't we help him so he just goes away, already?”

“Probably because he's doing something illegal and stupid and we'll have to stop him.” Tony reached down to pick up his wretch, jaw clenched tightly at the thought of all the mischief that Wade was probably causing.

As if seeing the alarm on Peter's face, Steve stepped in once again to quell his worries. “We will find out what he's doing and, if it is something we can help with, we will.”

Tony huffed, not quite able to agree with Steve on this one. “Or we could put him in jail… You know, where he belongs? Hell, I hear they have this wonderful facility in Siberia that's impossible to escape and as far away as possible from us? I bet he would love it there.”

“Can't I help, too?” Peter asked. Both of them swiveled their heads over to look at him. Even Bucky piped up with his two cents.

“Absolutely not!”

“Hell no!”

“Not on your life, Kid.”

“Why not?” Peter demanded. He loved his parents, he really did, but they were so _overbearing_. He could handle his own just fine. Already he'd gone up against Deadpool – _Twice,_ even! - and come out just fine!

“Because it's dangerous, Peter! You're not ready, yet!” 

“When, then? When will I be ready?” The boy's patience was wearing thin. Steve and Tony exchanged a look.

“Peter...”

“Forget it,” Peter brushed past them, going towards his room. If his parents weren't going to be fair then there was no point in talking to them. Tony called out his name in warning, but he went ignored and Peter continued to stalk down the hallway.

“The spider child is not happy,” Thor noted, turning his attention from the hallways where Peter had disappeared to look at Steve and Tony.

“Well, he's gonna have to get over it.” Tony leaned down and picked up his wrench from where it'd fallen on the floor. “It's our job to protect him and I'm going to do that whether he likes it or not.”

“Peter has a very big heart,” Steve clarified, placing a hand on Tony's shoulder to calm him down. “He just doesn't understand the dangers of always listening to it, is all. Given time, I'm sure he'll be a very capable hero, but it's just not the right time, yet.”

“Hmm.” Thor nodded his understanding. “So, about defending the city from this trouble, the Pool of Death...”

 


	7. Chapter 7

Peter hated going behind his parents back. Ever since they'd discovered his superhero identity, he'd been pretty honest about most things in his life. Sure, sometimes he went against their wishes and snuck out or made a mess of Tony's lab, but these were pretty harmless things and it wasn't like he did them often. Tony and Steve had come to trust him and Pete really felt like he was letting them down by doing this. They'd been pretty adamant about him keeping as far away from Deadpool as possible. 

The problem was that they didn't understand. This wasn't about breaking their trust or doing something against the rules. In fact, Peter was trying to do the _right_ thing. Sure, Wade had seemed kinda out of his mind when they'd met, but he'd come asking for help. For _Spiderman's_ help.

Being here was a bad idea – Of course it was – but he had to. Hopefully, once all of this was gone and past, Steve and Tony would understand. Peter perched on the roof above the taco place that Wade had suggested they meet at, scanning the area for the masked mercenary.

“Aw. Are you looking for little old me?” Wade's voice startled Peter out of his focused gaze, making him turn back to see Deadpool standing there, holding up something in both hands. “Aren't you just the sweetest? Here, I got you something.”  He tossed one of them to Spiderman, who caught it and gave it a once over.

“What's it with you and Mexican food?” Peter questioned, unwrapping the burrito he'd been given. He brought it up to his face and smelled it to make sure it wasn't riddled in drugs or something. Finding nothing out of the ordinary, he rolled up his mask to his nose and took a bite.

“'S my favorite,” Wade answered, sitting cross-legged on the roof. He wasn't eating his yet, just letting it sit in his lap. Instead he just watched Spiderman, as if waiting for some kind of reaction.

“Any leads on this Carnage guy?” Peter wondered between bites. 

Wade shook his head. “Nope. What about you?”

“I haven't seen anything suspiciously recently, no. I did do some research, though.” Peter reached into the waistband of his suit and pulled a slip of paper out of a hidden pocket he kept there.  He handed it over to Wade, who looked it over.

“This looks like some seriously top secret stuff, Spidey,” Wade noted, not even bothering to look up as he read the article over. “How'd you get ahold of this, anyways?”

“It wasn't that hard.” Peter shrugged, like it was nothing. “I didn't even have to do any hacking or intense research or anything like that. I just used my Dad's access passcode for SHEILD. He keeps it on a little sticky note in his office.”

Wade raised an eyebrow at this. “Your dad, huh? He some kind of top tier agent or something?” 

Peter seemed to realize he'd misspoke because he froze, the burrito halfway to his mouth. What was he doing? He had a secret identity to keep. He really shouldn't have been talking so freely with this psycho. “ No. He's not. It doesn't matter who he is. My personal life is none of your concern.”

Wade tilted his head a little, furrowing his brow. “No reason to get so defensive, baby boy. I was just curious. Besides, your secret is safe with me.”

“ Yeah.  _I'm_ _sure_ .” Peter quickly finished the rest of his burrito and pulled his mask back over his face before standing up. Maybe his parents were right. Maybe meeting with Deadpool was a bad idea. Already he was  being risky and getting too comfortable. 

They stared at one another for a moment, neither of them daring to move, until finally Wade smiled just the tiniest bit. “Ooo, Spidey. Would you mind escorting a girl home?”

Peter frowned, “You can't be serious.”

“ _Pleeease_ ?” he pleaded, holding his hands together in front of his heart. “You'd make me just the happiest if you did!”

“I can't believe you.” Peter rubbed his temple, trying to be patient with the mercenary. “ _Fine,_ but only so I know that you actually go home and aren't running around the city causing havoc. That's the last thing I  need.”

“ Yippee!”  Deadpool didn't need to be told twice, grabbing hold of Peter's wrist and dragging him towards the edge of the rooftop. Before the teen registered what was happening, he  was already free falling towards the street. Instinctively, he took hold of Wade's wrist and pulled him close enough to secure an arm around his waist before shooting out a web and slowing their decent to a less fatal speed.

When they landed safely in a barely wide enough alley, Peter turned to him, outraged. “What the hell was that?”

“Aw, lighten up a little, Spidey. I wouldn't have jumped if I didn't think you'd catch me,” Deadpool cooed. “I was just having a little fun. Besides, I hear New York looks the best in the arms of a big, strong webswinger.”

“I'm sure that's  _ exactly _ what you heard,” Peter grumbled, glaring daggers at the other. “Look, if you want to go swinging around the city, you ask. You don't just hurdle yourself and me off of buildings.”

“I'm sorry, Webs. I didn't mean it.” Wade looked off to the side, his index fingers pressing together in embarrassment. Peter sighed. The other couldn't have put on a more fake look of guilt if he tried. 

“Yeah, whatever. Just tell me where I'm taking you already so I can go home before people realize I snuck out after curfew.” They exchanged a few more words as Wade gave him the address for his apartment. Peter returned his arm around the mercenary's waist before swinging off into the night, attempting to take the least populated path he could manage. The way there was mostly quiet, speckled only with the occasional giggle from Deadpool.

[He's like some kind of crushing school girl.]

{Well, can you blame him? Spidey does have a pretty nice piece of ass.}

[If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were falling for that vigilante wannabe, too.]

{Aw, don't be like that! You know my heart's only for you.}

Finally, they came upon Wade's apartment and Peter lowered them both in front of the entrance. “This is it?”

“Yep!” Wade brought his arms to rest on Peter's shoulders, his leg coming up into the air behind him. “You can feel free to come in, Spidey ~! ”

“I think I better not,” Peter replied, slipping out of Wade's space and brushing imaginary wrinkles out of his suit. Wade leaned back towards him, close enough that their noses were touching.

“Not putting out on the first night, huh? Alright. I at least want a kiss, though.” Peter remained frozen as Deadpool leaned in and pressed their masked mouths together, just briefly. Granted, their lips never actually touched, but Peter's entire face lit up in embarrassment, nonetheless.

“Goodnight, Baby boy!” Wade was already halfway in his door when it finally registered to Peter that it was over. He shook his head out and tried to reorientate himself before swinging a web and heading towards his own house. He needed to get back to bed before anyone realized he was missing in the first place.

Unknown to both of them, a third figure had been watching the whole exchange, hidden deep in the shadows. His red suit seemed to crawl across his person, as if alive.

“The spider… He feels different...” they hissed to themselves. “But he is with the man… The one who killed Shriek…” The return answer seemed to come from a second voice inside the figure's mind.

“We should capture the spider… He would not hurt us if we have man's pet.”

“And then we kill spider?” There was a moment before the second voice answered him. It was kind of unusual for it to take so long with such a simple question. Before the figure could point this out, however, the voice responded.

“Then we kill.”


	8. Chapter 8

“I know that look.” Peter looked up at the sound of Mary Jane's voice, only to see her and Harry standing their with matching lunch trays. It was the middle of the school day and Peter had been distracted all morning. Despite himself, his mind had kept wandering back to Deadpool and their few meetings. Particularly the last one. Mary Jane slid into the seat across from him, her eyes mischievous. “You've got a girlfriend, Pete?”

“What? No!” Peter shook his head. 

“Come on, Man. The last time you started making that face it was before you and MJ got together,” Harry pointed out, taking the seat to his right. Peter picked up one of the carrot sticks on his tray and pointed it at them.

“I'm telling you. No girlfriend. I'm just distracted by some work stuff.” He took a bite of the carrot as they thought this over.

Mary Jane would not give up, however. A smirk settled neatly on her lips. “So… Your crush is another superhero? I could  _ totally _ understand that. Not to make things weird, Pete, but your dads are basically the hottest people this side of New York.”

“No! My crush isn't a superhero! I don't have one!” Peter hissed, struggling to keep his voice down. “Look, it just has to do with this one guy who's asked me to help him recently. He's not really conventional and a lot of the other s don't like him, but I feel like I should help him, anyways. Like he really needs someone to believe in him for once.”

“ That does sound kinda complicated,” Harry noted, giving Peter a sympathetic look. “What's he making you help him with?”

“I don't really know, for sure. He says he's tracking down a really dangerous villain, but all we've done so far is hang out. I'm starting to wonder if he's just messing with me.” Peter rubbed his eyes, trying to think of what to do with this guy.

“It sounds to me like he's just using the whole villain thing to get you guys some alone time, if you get what I mean.” Mary Jane leaned forward in her chair conspiratorially. “I think you should  _ totally _ look into this, Peter.”

“But, I don't really think I'm into him like that. I mean, I haven't even seen his face before.” Peter sighed, pushing his food around on his tray. “This whole thing is stupid, if he was interested in something with me, he should come out and say so, not play these stupid mind games. Besides, he's not exactly my type.”

“No offense, Pete, but you don't really have a type. Someone bats their pretty eyes at you and suddenly you're all over them.” Mary Jane patted his hand, sympathetically. Peter's expression screwed up in annoyance at that remark. “Don't make that face, hon. It only means we can work with just about anything. This is your chance to stop being Lonely McLoner.”

“You're one to talk, MJ. You and Harry are as single as I am.” The two friends in question exchanged a look.

“Actually Peter, MJ and I both are in a relationship, right now,” Harry corrected, making Peter's eyes widen. “ Mary Jane met someone named Pedro at a charity auction and I've been seeing this girl, Lily, after meeting her at a party a few months ago.”

“What?”

“ You would love Pedro, Pete. He wants to be a hero, too.” Mary Jane turned to the side, her mind clearly not with them. “Just… with less danger. He's a volunteer firefighter, right now.”

Peter's expression morphed into a pout. “Wow, guys. Way to keep me updated on your lives. Don't I feel special.”

“ That's something coming from you, Peter.”

“What we're trying to say, Pete, is that you should live a little! Nothing would make me happier than to see you with someone too!” Mary Jane took his hands in her own, squeezing them in excitement. “When you get married to this guy, I'll make sure your union is just as big news as the one between Captain America and Ironman!”

“Thanks, MJ, but don't hold your breath. I don't really see me being interested in him any time soon.” Peter pulled his hands out of her grip, trying to quell her excitement without being a jerk about it.

“ _ Please _ . You have got to be at least a little smitten for him! I saw the look you had when we walked over here!” Peter rolled his eyes. Mary Jane was really trying too hard.

“Come on! That look means nothing. If anything, it tells you I'm distracted. I make the same face when I'm thinking about what's for lunch in the middle of the day.” Harry shrugged, not really able to argue with that.

“He's got a point, MJ.”

“ You guys just aren't seeing the big picture!” Mary Jane insisted. “I promise you the only reason he hasn't kissed you, yet, is because he's waiting for you to make a move!”

“Actually, he has kissed me… Sort of.” Peter put a forkful of food in his mouth while admitting this, as if it was nothing. “He's kinda a weird guy, though, so I didn't think much of it.”

“ _ What _ ?” Mary Jane practically squealed, making Peter cringe, slightly. “Peter!”

“What?” he muttered.

“I hate to say it, Peter, but if that doesn't get through to you then you really are dense,” Harry added. “I think MJ is right on this one.”

“For real?”  When a nod from both of them confirmed it,  Peter hid his face in his palm and groaned. “ _ Uuuhg _ . Maybe I should let him down easy and-”

“Absolutely not!” Mary Jane objected. “Peter Parker, don't you dare! You're gonna try to actually get somewhere with this one, so help me God...”

“That sounds like a really bad idea...”

“Too bad. It's not like you have to marry the guy. Just give him a chance, will ya?” Peter could see that she was not going to back down from this. With an exasperated sound, he threw his hands up.

“ _ Fine _ .”

 


	9. Chapter 9

Wade had had a pretty shitty day so far.

It'd all begun when he'd gotten up that morning to find that his favorite pair of socks had been attacked by a rat. Really not the ideal way to wake up in the morning. Then, he'd discovered his fridge was empty, which was basically the most tragic thing that could happen to a guy like himself. After that, he'd gone around the corner to get himself a breakfast burrito, only to run into Thor and ended up engaging in a battle that left him sore and with his favorite Mexican place leveled. All in all, a really sucky day.

So, when he sat on the roof of a building somewhere across the borough from his apartment, he didn't have very high hopes for the evening. Two random crates had been left on this particular roof and he'd claimed one for himself. A pizza box sat on the ground next to him, still warm from when he'd picked it up. He had reason to believe that it was topped with Spiderman's favorites, so long as shady websites were good sources of information for that kind of thing. The night was fast approaching and Wade stayed put, kicking his legs back and forth.

[ It's a little pathetic, you know. How obsessed you are with him. ]

Wade glanced upwards out of the corner of his eye, as if he could see the white box that was talking to him. “Maybe.”

[He doesn't like you back.]

{He's got a point. Why are you doing this in the first place?}

Wade kicked a stone by his foot, sending it across the roof. “That's simple, Boxes. It's because we need fake Spidey to think we like him. You guys have heard of bait before, haven't you?” For a moment, the boxes were quiet, considering this.

{But what if fake Spidey hurts the real one?}

“I'm not worried. All he's gotta do is get close enough that I can hit him with my little friend.” Wade patted his inner thigh, referring to the dagger he kept there for safekeeping. “Besides, Spiderman is expendable. It's not like I owe the guy or anything. Sure, he's cute, but not cute enough to worry myself over.”

[You keep telling yourself that.]

Wade was about to object, when suddenly the webslinger in question landed on the roof, taking in the sight before him. “Deadpool.”

“Hey-ya, Sweetie! I'm so glad to see you're home!” Wade brushed aside the conversation he'd been having with his boxes and picked up the pizza box to offer some to Peter. “I made us dinner and it's still warm for you!”

Peter eyed him as he sat down on the empty crate, suspiciously. Finally, his gaze moved down to the pizza and he removed his gloves and rolled his mask up to his nose before accepting a piece.

“It's my favorite,” Peter noted between bites.

Wade let himself have a small victorious smile. “Yeah. Mine too.”

When the mercenary made no move to take a piece, himself, Peter grew a little suspicious. “Aren't you going to have some?”

“Nah,” Wade replies with a shrug. “Not really feeling pizza, tonight.”

“For someone who's idea of a date is eating shitty food on rooftops, you don't really eat much,” Peter pointed out, gesturing towards Wade with his piece of pizza. “Is it about your face or something? You don't have to take off your whole mask or anything.”

“Can't a guy just not be hungry?”

“Every time I see them? Seems like something else to me.”Peter refocused his attention on his food, leaving them in silence for a few moments. When it was finally broken again, it was Peter who broke it.

“Hey… Uh… You remember that Parker kid you kidnapped a while back?” he asked, reaching for a second pizza when Wade tilted the box towards him. “What'd you, ya know, think of him?”

“ _Kidnapped_?” Wade repeated, offended, “I put him back when I was done! It was more like borrowing-”

“Dude, not the point I was getting at.”

Wade shrugged, indifferently. “He's a dorky little kid, I guess. Not really my type.”

[Liar.]

Wade glanced back towards the corner of his eye, again. “You, shut up.”

Peter slumped a little at this. “Oh. Right. Well… At least you didn't want to pancake him on the sidewalk or anything. Him and I are close, so I gotta watch out for him.”

“How'd you meet him, anyways?”

“I've just known him all my life.” Peter shrugged. “Don't bother trying to use him against me, though. His parents are Captain America and Iron man. I don't even _have_ to watch out for him, anymore. They just do it whether he likes it or not.”

“Seems like a weight off your shoulders.” Wade noted.

Peter laughed at that. “Hardly. They think they know what's best for him, but they don't know everything. If they were aware that I was seeing you like this, they probably wouldn't let him see me anymore. I mean, what's up with that? Sure, you were kinda scary when you were up against those muggers, but so long as I keep you as far away from conflict as absolutely possible, you're not so bad.”

Wade laughed. “I'll take that as a compliment, I guess.”

“Feel free to.” Peter smiled just the tiniest bit. He finished off the rest of his slice of pizza before rolling his mask back down and standing up. “Right. Well… This was fun, but I've gotta get going.”

Wade followed suit, momentarily setting the pizza aside. “Course. Hero stuff, right?”

“Right. Goodnight, Wade.”

“G'night, Spidey.”

They stood there a moment, not really sure what else to say, but feeling like there should be something. As if acting on impulse, Peter leaned forward and pressed a masked kiss to Wade's cheek. Before the other could really react to the tiny action, the webslinger was off, swinging across the sky as quickly as he could.

Did he just…

Well then.

As Deadpool stared after him, dumbfound, he didn't notice the goo-like substance winding around Peter's leg and into his socks. Carnage was on the move.


End file.
